shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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