So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
