I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
