More tranny stories later!
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize
