Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
