Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
