WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
