I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Drunk is a universal language darling
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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