dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
