Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
