singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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