Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
