There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize