Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
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