You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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