Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
