Girls should come with a carfax report
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
