bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
