Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
