I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Is this like a preordered booty call?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize