her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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