So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
