oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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