The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
My vagina just clenched in fear
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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