just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
