I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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