Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Randomize
