Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
