Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
