Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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