I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
