Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
