It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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