new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize