i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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