Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Pants are for mortals
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
