Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
