Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize