The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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