Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
