I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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