we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
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