I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
