what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I need a burrito and a hug.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
