Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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