So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
