id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
