Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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