you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
