you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
